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The BDFL's Weekly Game Summaries

By Bob Bullet

Week 16

Round Two

“Merry Christmas baby, you sure do treat me right.” -Springsteen.

“All is quiet on New Year’s Day.” -U2

Who’s hot?

The Woosiers:  Woo saw it all coming.  He saw it back in the spring when he nabbed Vince Young with a Pony pick.  He saw it again at mid-season gathering in Maurice Jones-Drew.  And he foretold that his Hayden Haymakers would be throwing over-hand rights and body blows when the BDFL season got down to crunch time.  The Cy-kick Woosiers derailed the championship hopes of the PowerSleds, with a 59-point performance in Round Two of the Big Daddy Championship Series.  Now the Woo Crew slides to the Big Daddy Bowl with the momentum of a one-horse sleight rolling downhill.  Pity the Wizards.

Who’s not?

The Gamblers: Scoring in single-digits is one thing, absorbing an A.W. at the undersized hands of the Fighting Slovaks is quite another.  If not for a major coaching blunder in Week 15, the lowly Euro-trash talkers could be playing for the BDFL Championship.

Stat of the week:

Maurice Jones-Drew (Jaguars – Woosiers): 19-carries, 131-yards, and 2-TDs, including one for 74-yards for 18-BDFL points in the Woo Crew’s A.W. of the Power Sleds in the semi-finals of the BDCS.

Stat of the week two, for Woo (to the victor go the spoils):

Vince Young (Titans – Woosiers): 13 of 20 for 183-yards and two touchdowns, and 8-carries for 61-yards and a game-winning 36-yard run for a TD, (12-total-BDFL-points) keeping the Titans in the hunt for the last AFC playoff spot with a rookie record starting record of 8-4.

Quote of the week:

“A perfectly good Christmas shot to hell,” said Bullet even after inserting another first-time starter, Ladell Betts, (12-points) with one of his many “one night stand” line-up insertions (see Kyle Boller – 9-points in Week 6; John Hall 11-points, Week 5) in 2006, and still losing.  The moves earned the Bullets the Red Neck Division championship and kept the Bullets firing all season long.

Play of the week (and 18-point swing):

Seattle’s Nate Burleson’s 96-yard kick off return for a TD is called back on a very questionable call negating the Bullets of 12-points, but still giving the Seahawks good field position for an eventual Shaun Alexander (Wizards – University of Alabama - #1 BDFL Draft Choice) touchdown.  The 18-point swing gave the mediocre Wizards the margin of vict’ry and a spot in the Big Daddy Bowl for all the marbles.

Power of the number one pick:

The Pasco County Pixie Dusters had the top choice – even though they phoned it in – to nab #37-Shaun who paid off in Week 16 putting the league’s 8th point-total team in the finals.  “Who said the BDFL doesn’t award mediocrity?”

“Out there” of the week:

With apologies to rain drops on roses and whiskers on kittens, “Light bulbs, worm pills, watermelons, nails, and aluminum cans… these are a few of my favorite things,” said Mukes after his Three Toed Sloth Monsters pulled out a Week 16 vict’ry over the bumbling Bootleggers.

Edspiration:

“You bunch of mullets!” yelled Mac Sanderson on many occasions.  The Bulletin left out the Mullet Series games due to holiday time constraints, dressing, extra turkey legs, ham, rolls, pecan pie, red velvet cake, and cranberries shaped like the inside of a tin can.

“Seinfeld Four” Sit-com moment:

Elaine: “I’m going to the Super (Big Daddy) Bowl with Tim Whatley.”

“Seinfeld II:

JERRY: So you won't believe what happened with Whatley today. It got back to him that I made this little dentist joke and he got all offended. Those people can be so touchy.
KRAMER: Those people. Listen to yourself.
JERRY: What?
KRAMER: You think that dentists are so different from me and you? They came to this country just like everybody else, in search of a dream.
JERRY: Kramer, he's just a dentist.
KRAMER: Yeah, and you're an anti-dentite.

JERRY: I am not an anti-dentite!
KRAMER: You're a rabid anti-dentite! Oh, it starts with a few jokes and some slurs. "Hey, denty!" Next thing you know you're saying they should have their own schools.
JERRY: They do have their own schools!
KRAMER: Yeah!

Reason #2 to be in the BDFL:

The Big Daddy Bowl on Big Daddy Day, New Year’s Rockin’ Eve.

Next week:

Big Daddy Bowl V: Wizards vs. Woosiers; does anything else matter.  Does Parks still have flashbacks to the Dan Reeves (Bonehead) move that cost him a championship a few years ago?  Will the Wizards stand up to the Woosiers onslaught?  Let’s get ready to rumble!

Quote of the

Week

"Big Daddy Bowl V: Wizards vs. Woosiers; does anything else matter"
 

Back Bull 2006

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2005 Back Big Daddies: w1  w2  w3  w4  w5  w6  w7  w8  w9  w10  w11  w12  w13  w14  w15  w16  w17

The BDFL | Mayors | Grenades | Cheetahs | PowerSleds | Bullets | Gamblers | Bootleggers | Woosiers

Wildcats | Juggernauts | Dogs | Blades | Wooden Warriors | Wizards | Sloth Monsters | Fighting Slovaks

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