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The Wizard's Quote of
the Week
“Mr. Saturday Night Special may be good for nothing but putting a man
six feet in a hole, but that probably assumes none of the 'Free State of
Lowndes County Confederates' are pullin’ the trigger"
Past Picks
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ELVO moves to the front |
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Latest Lines |
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Week 9 |
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WW @ GRE (-3.5) |
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WIZ (-5.5) @ PS |
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MAY @ SM (-3.5) |
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CHE (-3.5) @ FS |
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BUL @ DOG (-5.5) |
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WOO (-7.5) @ WIL |
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BLA (-3.5) @ GAM |
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JUG @ BOO (-5.5) |
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OPEN: ATL, GB,
JAX & TEN |
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The ol' crystal ball was a little cloudy
in Week 8 as the Wizard slipped to 3-5 and fell behind ELVO in the year
long race to the POTY |
ELVO is two steps ahead in the race for
the POTY
LAS VEGAS - With a weak 3-5 effort in Week
8, the Wizard has fallen off the pace and must make up some time in Week
9 to get back in line for the coveted POTY award. Now on to the Week 9 picks...
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BDFL SCORECARD |
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Wizard |
ELVO |
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31 |
33 |
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From The Crystal Ball
The BDFL's Pigskin
Prognostications - Week 9
By Spaceman Spiff
Wooden Warriors vs.
Grenades
The “Grain Sprangs Glue Factory” will be
officially open for business this weekend, which is none too soon for
Chris Hand as he works to maintain his lofty perch atop the Gray Beard
Division. Out of the gate the Grenades will be sorely tested at their
grand opening when they entertain the “Spirited Black Crick
Spearchuckers” (they’re not touchy, just high spirited), who have their
own designs on winning the Green Horn pennant after a monster game in
Week 8. If the Grenades hope to leave this bitter “Sibling Civil War” in
something other than a full retreat, Chris had better use some of the
stick ‘em he deployed in August of 1980 at Bryant-Denny Stadium when he
put the brakes on future Bama star Joey Jones in the North-South All
Star football game. Unfortunately for the Tribe, their medicine man is
highly unlikely to have an antidote for the Grenade’s glue and you can
expect Chris to shut down the Warrior attack in violent fashion.
Wizard’s Winner…the Grenades.
Juggernauts vs. Bootleggers
You can bet there’ll be plenty of praisin' the
Lord and passin’ the ammunition this weekend when the “Baptist
Bible-Thumpers” from Bristol start raining hell fire and brimstone down
on the visiting “Jugtown Jubilettes” and their high-steppin’ revue.
Neither team is headed for the postseason, but there is still pride to
play for on both sides. The ‘Nauts have relied on Michael Vick all year,
which has been a big reason for their erratic play together with a knee
injury to Stephen Davis, and it won’t get any better when they go to
Vick’s back-up due to him taking the weekend off. Regardless, at the end
of the day expect the Bootleggers to give the Juggernauts a dippin’
(that means being baptized in East TN for you Catholics) they won’t soon
forget.
Wizard’s Winner…the Bootleggers
Mayors vs. Sloth Monsters
The “City Hall Spin Doctors” have been going at
full tilt in recent weeks trying to explain to their constituents why
this season has gone so horribly wrong. The 2002 champions crash landed
last season and do not appear to have found the magic ingredient that
made them the BDFL’s “favorite son” two short years ago. Perhaps this
weekend will provide a little tonic for the Mayors and their bruised
egos in the form of the “Silver Lakes Goofy Goblins” who continue to
struggle in the standings despite upsetting the Cheetahs this past
weekend. Nevertheless, the first Sunday in November is likely to be no
better than the first Tuesday in November for the Mayors, which should
mean more high speed spinning for Alan’s polls.
Wizard’s Winner…the Sloth Monsters.
Cheetahs vs. Fighting Slovaks
It’s the “Old Country” versus the “Oldest
Profession” this Sunday when Butch Neal breaks out the chips, dip,
chains, and whips for a mid-year social affair (“Ya’ load up, ya’
party!”) with the Fighting Slovaks. The Slovaks are fresh off an upset
over the Mayors and have every intention of keeping their green card for
another week. However, the closest the Cheetahs will come to that is
giving the Slovaks the nickel tour of the red light district. Last
weekend the Slovaks cobbled together points in an unusual manner that is
highly unlikely to happen again, and will leave the “Injured Immigrants”
on a slow boat headed back across the “Big Pond”.
Wizard’s Winner…the Cheetahs.
Wizards vs. Power Sleds
Merlin took one up the tailpipe last weekend when
the Grenades unleashed a barrage that overwhelmed the “Magical Mystery
Ship” and had the Wizards spending most of the past week having the
Grenades’ present surgically removed from their posterior. The only
benefit was the Wizards did get a free case of ice cold A&W Root Beer
for the “AW’” they received to ease the pain. Meanwhile the Sleds have
been ridin’ that “Midnight Train to Memphis” all the way to Indy to make
sure their lead dog, Peyton Manning, has his choice of creature comforts
while traveling to the upcoming game. Unfortunately for Jack, it is
tough to ride the rails on one player, which they will find out this
Sunday when the Wizards bring a picnic basket full of tea and crumpets,
and more than one can of “whoop @$$” to Fairfield.
Wizard’s Winner…the Wizards.
Woosiers vs. Wildcats
In what appears to be a mismatch on paper, the
“Smoke Rise Love Guns” will take to the road intent on pulling their
trigger on the “Caterwauling Timid Cats”, who have come back to earth in
the record column after a string of defeats have all but dashed their
bid to claim their division title by proxy. Meanwhile, the “Woo Crew”
continues to steam through their division unabated, and appear to be a
lock on going to the BDFL “Big Dance” at the end of the season. The
Great Wizardo doesn’t see much of a chance for the Wildcats to cut in on
the Woosiers during their Sunday afternoon waltz despite a very tempting
line by ELVO.
Wizard’s Winner…the Woosiers.
Bullets vs. Dogs
Mr. Saturday Night Special may be good for nothing
but putting a man six feet in a hole, but that probably assumes none of
the “Free State of Lowndes County Confederates” are pullin’ the trigger.
The Bullets started firing blanks somewhere during the first round of
the BDFL Genuine Draft and have never thought to check their ammunition
pouches since. Meanwhile, it’s been a “Dog Day Afternoon” for most of
the “Hounds from Hell (aka Brookside)” opponents as the Dogs seek to
remain atop their division as the season slides into its second half.
Although the Bullets have been grooming a young gunslinger in
Pittsburgh, it’s unlikely that he alone will be quick enough on the draw
to carry a team that’s a step slow and bit long in the tooth.
Wizard’s Winner…the Dogs.
Blades vs. Gamblers
When the devil went down to Georgia looking for a
soul to steal, (the Wizardo understands he may have been in a bind and
way behind, and lookin’ to make a deal) it would have been a bit smarter
if he had headed down into the Bayou instead to sample some of the local
kinfolk where he would have found card dealin’ much more to his liking.
Instead, it will be Lyle Arrington and his “Slashers and Thrashers” that
will venture down to the Gulf Coast with hopes of drawing a few inside
straights against Kenny Breal’s “Redneck Riviera Swamp Rats”. It may be
time to fold on the 2004 season as the Gamblers have watched the
Woosiers all but vanish over the horizon, but Kenny can still cut his
losses with some victories down the backstretch. Unfortunately for
Kenny, it is highly unlikely he will leave the table with his fiddle of
gold.
Wizard’s Winner…Blades.
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