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The Wizard's Quote of
the Week
"The red light
district near Trey Pettimore Stadium is more akin to a glowing bug
zapper than anything else, so the “Sin Wagon” had better stop by Ol’ Man
Kelsie’s Package Store on the way down Highway 82 to pick up plenty of
insect repellant before he arrives because they grow the local skeeters
mighty big and mighty green in Lowndes County"
Past Picks
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The race is dead even |
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Latest Lines |
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Week 7 |
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WOO @ GRE (-2.5) |
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BOO @ PS (P) |
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CHE (-5.5) @ BUL |
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MAY @ GAM (P) |
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WIZ (-3.5) @ DOG |
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FS @ WIL (-1.5) |
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JUG @ WW (-6.5) |
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BLA @ SM (P) |
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OPEN: HOU, PIT, SF & WAS |
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The Wizard goes 4-4 in Week 6 to keep the
Battle of the POTY even |
After Week 6 it's still even in the race
to the POTY
LAS VEGAS - The pucker factor is on overtime
as the competition gets as tight as ever in the BDFL's race to the POTY
On to the picks...
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BDFL SCORECARD |
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Wizard |
ELVO |
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24 |
24 |
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From The Crystal Ball
The BDFL's Pigskin
Prognostications - Week 7
By Spaceman Spiff
Juggernauts vs. Wooden Warriors
The “Lioness of Leeds” appeared to have drafted a team with possible
championship timbre at the “BDFL Genuine Draft” although injuries and
sub-par play by fantasy league favorite Michael Vick have since led to
the Juggernauts’ demise. Allyson has learned the hard way that roaring
in August doesn’t cut much ice when it’s time to pick up the league
title hardware in December. Meanwhile, the “Black Crick Lumber Company”
has been getting sawed off at the knuckles in recent weeks and has their
own set of problems to deal with if they plan to go to the big dance
again this year. Nevertheless, getting spayed and de-clawed well before
midseason has left the ‘Nauts largely defenseless making them easy
pickings for the Warriors.
Wizard’s Winner…the Wooden Warriors.
Blades vs. Sloth Monsters
Mike Dismukes will take time off from e-mailing his vitriolic tirades to
the Commissioner on Sunday just long enough to entertain the visiting
“Shelby County Super Sabers” at his Silver Lakes “Little House of
Horrors.” Despite spreading fear and destruction among the rest of the
BDFL in recent years that included a title, visiting the Sloth Monsters
has been more like a trip to the “Little House on the Prairie” than
anything else so far in 2004. However, this team is better than it has
shown and may be ready to return to their rightful place among the BDFL
elite starting with the Blades.
Wizard’s Winner… the Blades.
Woosiers vs. Grenades
After being forced to ride shotgun after being so pumped up the first
few weeks of the season, the Grenade’s nads have returned to a more
normal size in the last couple of weeks after stubbing their toes on
their laurels. Nevertheless, the Nads (gonadius giganticus) are the real
McCoy and plan to borrow an air gun from the local U-totem convenience
store in hopes of inflating the family jewels back to “shotgun size”
before the Woosiers arrive. Threatening to rain on their parade are the
“West Blount Wrastlers” who are sure to be dressed out in their finest
tights (They’re not tights, they’re the required uniform!) and should be
out of recovery from their recent lobotomy in time to give the visitors
all they can handle. ELVO has been on the “homer” bandwagon so far this
year, but picked the wrong dog this week.
Wizard’s Winner…the Woosiers.
Bootleggers vs. Power Sleds
They’ll be plenty of spare parts scattered around Fairfield this weekend
when Jon Wood’s big, black Motorcraft / Citgo Woods brothers Dodge and
Jack Barnes’ top fuel dragsters take the green light Sunday afternoon.
The Sleds have gone into the ditch and stand little chance of getting
themselves righted in time to make any type of run at the Grenades, and
the Bootleggers have their own hill to climb if they expect to track
down the Woosiers before season’s end. Nevertheless, with sporting
respectable records, there is still plenty to play for, which should
make this a very interesting contest before the parachutes fly at the
quarter mile mark. In the end, however, expect the Power Sleds to smoke
their tires at the start and the Bootleggers to be drinking some of
Pulaski, TN’s finest sippin’ whiskey at the end of the day.
Wizard’s Winner…the Bootleggers.
Wizards vs. Dogs
The “Arts & Croissants” crowd has been living in the lap of luxury in
recent weeks including a magical Monday night for the ages that robbed
the erstwhile Wildcats of a victory last Sunday despite their best
scoring output of the season. On the other side of the BDFL tracks are
Mark Burr’s “Junkbond Dogs” courtesy of the Coalburg/Brookside/Cardiff
connection, who have made a statement that they are a team to be
reckoned with in ’04. Not since ’98 when they finished a very tight
second have the Dogs been in such a position to track down their first
BDFL title, and the lead Dog has no intention of moving back to where
the scenery never changes. There are few free passes in the rough ‘n
tumble BDFL although the Wizards used one last. Nevertheless, their
“Get-out-of-Jail-free” card will expire before the first can of caviar
is opened at Five Mile Crick Ballpark.
Wizard’s Winner…the Dogs.
Cheetahs vs. Bullets
The red light district near Trey Pettimore Stadium is more akin to a
glowing bug zapper than anything else, so the “Sin Wagon” had better
stop by Ol’ Man Kelsie’s Package Store on the way down Highway 82 to
pick up plenty of insect repellant before he arrives because they grow
the local skeeters mighty big and mighty green in Lowndes County. Also,
the Cheetahs shouldn’t expect to get compensated much for displaying
their wares or demonstrating their various positions either when try to
entice the local yokels for a little Saturday night hayride…Cheetah
style. Meanwhile, the Bullets are languishing far behind in their
division, but showed they can play the role of a “giant killer” quite
well when they took down the high flying Grenades two weeks ago.
However, you wouldn’t expect an upset like that to happen again any more
than you expect lightning to strike twice or one of the Cheetahs to
legitimately wear white when they walk down the aisle.
Wizard’s Winner…the Cheetahs.
Fighting Slovaks vs. Wildcats
After immigrating from the old country, the last of the “Slovakian
Communist Hardliners” had hoped to escape the trappings of democracy,
but jumped out of the pot into the fire after joining the BDFL were only
the strong survive long while the young and feeble are fed to the
masses. Next up on their trip around the league pecking order are Jerry
James’ “Fancy Felines” who, despite sporting a good record, still lag in
the all important points battle. Although the Wildcats are rookies as
well, it may be hard to tell after they get stalking the Slovaks.
Wizard’s Winners…the Wildcats.
Mayors vs. Gamblers
Politics makes strange bedfellows and no one in the BDFL has woken with
any stranger fellows on the other side of the bed than Alan Arrington’s
“Liberal Lap Dogs” in recent years. Despite teaming up for an
unsuccessful run at instituting a state lottery a few years ago, the
Mayors and the “Bayou La Batre (the Wizard just loves sayin’…Bayou La
Batre) Bone Rollers” find themselves on opposite sides of the political
fence this weekend. One would think that with the waters getting chummed
from the “Birmingham Bleeding Hearts” the local sharks would be
schooling in anticipation. However, expect the Mayors to leave the coast
late Sunday with their campaign promises fully intact.
Wizard’s Winner…the Mayors.
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