Armadillos top Mayors with Top Gun effort:

If Alabama is playing in the eastern time zone, you can mark down Kurt Prewitt being there in person with his familiar “A Club” cap on and ready for action. KP made it a “family affair” with son Wil coming up from Nashville. The Prewitt Pair rendezvoused with several other Tide fans including JrBDFL Commissioner, Matthew Hand. It all worked. It turned out to be a blowout vict’ry for the Crimson Tide, and the ‘Dillos took that momentum to Sunday and to the BDFL. The “little ol’ team from Texas (by way of Charlotte),” rolled up a “Top Gun” 42-point performance on their way to an impressive win against the two-time, defending champion Mayors. It was a win that the Armadillos needed. For a consolation prize, Arrington gets grouped in with the Hand Brothers (see below).    

Commissioner flexes against Gamblers:

The Mineral Springs Grenadiers got a much needed win in Week Ten by outscoring the Gulf Coast Gamblers, 33-28. This was a good game from start to finish. The Dixie Mafia rolled out the red carpet for the Commissioner along the Gulf Coast. The strategy worked early for the “Real Deal,” but he didn’t expect Iron Hand to rally back with excellent hands of Blackjack, doubling down, rolling some sevens at the craps tables, and hitting some clutch rolls on the proverbial wheel of fortune. Chris Hand also took advantage of the hospitality, and when the 4th quarter rolled around, the game was still in question, and the Grenadiers made more plays down the stretch than the Gamblers, and the Grenadiers escaped with a crucial win in the BDFL.    

Mukes mashes Mark’s Mutts:

The Brookside Dogs have been on top all season in the BDFL. They’ve been barking and biting to the summit of the standings with win after win in the first half of 2023. However, in Week Ten, the Sloth Monsters stopped the Dogs in their tracks. Muke’s team put together a total team effort and completely dominated the Dogs, mashing “Mark’s Mutts” by three touchdowns. The Three Toed Tree Dwellers scored 32-points and came within 3-points of administering an A.W. The Bulletin is reporting that there were no A.W.’s this past weekend in the BDFL, but this was the closest one to that 21-point threshold of an A.W. The win was celebrated completely by the Sloths under the 24-hour rule, while the Dogs were left shaking their heads to try and find out exactly what went wrong.    

Bellcows continue to roll nullifying ‘Nauts:

The Fieldstown Bellcows were “dead in the water” three weeks ago. Not only have they rebounded and revived… the Bell Heads have thrived. The Jugtown Juggernauts were no match for Bellcows in Week Ten. Allyson’s ‘Nauts barely put up a fight in rolling over and playing dead against the Bellcows. The Fieldstown Road Rivalry ended with Belrose nullifying the ‘Nauts, 31-16, in a game that was not as close at the final score would indicate. Actually, upon further review, the game was exactly what the final score indicated that it was, a two touchdown win for the Rolling Bellcows and a tough loss for A.E. & Company. “I ordered my SEC Championship Game tickets,” said Allyson, in an attempt to “turn the page” from a BDFL defeat.    

Wildcats resurgence continues as Sleds slide:

Another team trending in the right direction is the Western Hills Wildcats, and a team that is sliding or sledding backwards is the Fairfield PowerSleds. “I had to get outta there,” said Mad Jack Barnes, years ago getting away from roommate Jerry James, who was doing his homework, “and splitting atoms,” according to Jack. The pair of ex-Fairfield Tigers always get “fired up” for their annual rivalry. Over the years, the Sleds have typically had the advantage. But, this season, the BioCats turned that trend around and used it against the “Mean Machine.” So, the “James Gang” actually looks a little dangerous this season, and the Sleds are searching for answers and they can no longer pick up a six-pack of Stroh’s Light and show up at Apartment 21 at Bates Manor on 14th Avenue to quote / unquote regroup.  

Bandits vanquish Vulcans in OT:

The Altadena Bandits took advantage of a “fifth dimension” last week to pick up a pivotal win in the BDFL. In Week Ten the Black Trans Am with the T-Tops vanquished the young, but naïve North Birmingham Vulcans in overtime. Barry’s Bandits won on the Commissioner’s convoluted OT system and the Vulcans will have to put off moving out of their parents basement for another week. Nic Hand has held his own in the BDFL, but that doesn’t mean that he’s come away with a lot of wins. In mid November both the Smoky and the Bandits and the Rec League Vulcans are in a position where if things go their way in December, they may qualify for the Big Daddy Championship Series.  

Cheetahs shocked by daBlitz:

Granddaddy Butch Neal has become a world traveler, or at least a wonderer in the Western Hemisphere. Everywhere he goes, the Southside Cheetahs are recognized for their BDFL prowess. For a lesser person, or a younger man, that would certainly be a distraction. However, Butch lets his beach and breakfast times be interrupted by autographs, selfies, and fantasy football advice. Is it “rat poison?” Well, it worked like that in Week Ten in the BDFL as the Cheetahs paid a little too much attention to their press clippings and their praise on social media, and the Sin Wagon was derailed by the Druid City Blitz 20-9. The Gritz Blitz celebrated with crackers and cheese, wine and roses, and shrimp and grits. The Cheetahs took home the “Toilet Seat Team of the Weak” award.  

Bocephus beats Bullet in Brother Bowl:

If people knew the truth, nobody would want to be a 4th Hand Brother. It just comes with too much baggage and too much past – for lack of a better word – abuse. In another BDFL version of the Brother Bowl, Jaimie Hand’s Freebirds were two TDs better than Bullet’s Bentonites. Part of the “Hand Code,” is to never make excuses, so you won’t hear anything from Bullerino on his team not having their starting QB, or other coincidences that directly led to the loss suffered by the Bullets this past weekend. The Freebirds flew off with the vict’ry and tried not to brag too much.  

Random (Chris and Jaimie will get it) – The Bobby Fuller Four:

In no particular order… “Breaking rocks in the hot sun, I fought the law and the law won.” “I needed money, ‘cause I had none… I fought the law and the law won.” “I miss my baby and I feel so bad. I guess my race is run. She’s the best thing I ever had. I fought the law and the law won.”  

Week Ten in the JrBDFL – “It’s all about the kids.”

In the Junior League, Milton Hand’s Lowndes County Labs lost their JrBDFL game, but “won” all of their games in Week Ten in their “other” leagues. Jacob Wood and Matthew Hand were in Lexington with the JrBDFL probably being the last things on their mind as they tried to steal a little bit of the “credit” away from the Prewitt’s.  

The Fourth Hand Brother – Part 9:

Alan Arrington it’s your turn. All of the details on the “Mayor” being an honorary Hand Brother or more specifically the “4th Hand Brother, are a little sketchy for The Bulletin. But, that doesn’t mean that Alan doesn’t fully quality. The Bulletin couldn’t find records on how many Hand-Arrington meetings took place at Louie Louie’s, the Upside Down Plaza, Nick's, 2001, BJCC, the Irish Deli, City Stages, and Harry’s. (Not to mention annual beach, golf, and ski excursions) The Bulletin staff can confirm some City Stages events and specifically the BoDeans and Georgia Satellites. Bullet was single and living in Montgomery – and blast from the past – Arrington lived for awhile in Opelika/Auburn. “I think we’ve been duped,” said the lead singer of the Hoodoo Gurus at their concert in the old Beard-Eaves Memorial Coliseum in Lee County. Someone the previous week at UAB had told the Austrailian rockers to say “Roll Tide,” to the crowd in Auburn. Too funny. The place went silent, except for Alan and Bullet laughing and some cussing. At the late night Krystal’s, there was a cigarette machine along the wall where the patron’s lined up to order – something never witnessed before or after. So, the Commissioner probably has more stories and even Hime, but A.A. is this week’s version of the “4th Hand Brother.”