The Bulletin

After two World Fairs...I thought I'd seen it all, until I saw Ronnie Van Zant on a pumpkin

Grenadiers Continue Roll – Outscore Gamblers:

The Commissioner’s got it going on and there’s no better evidence than Week 8 in the BDFL. The Mineral Springs Grenadiers rolled past the Gulf Coast Gamblers recently on the Red Neck Riviera. It was a hard-fought, high-scoring affair with both teams lighting up the scoreboard with neon and LED bulbs. The Dixie Mafia put up 32-points on the new, energy efficient LED board. It was enough points to defeat 11 of the BDFL teams in Week 8, but it was not enough to knock off the Commish. Old Chris Hand’s team lit up the old-fashioned neon light scoreboard with a week-high 44-points to get the pivotal vict’ry over the Gamblers on their home beach sand casino back yard field.

Cheetahs Top Freebirds – Just 1-Point Short of A.W.:

The Southside Cheetahs had little or no trouble with the Fultondale Freebirds this past weekend. The Sin Wagon rolled up 42 points. Jammin’ Jaimie Hand had a semi-decent week, but still ended up losing by 20-points, which is just 1-point short of an A.W. Neither team seemed to let the game get in the way of their weekend activities as The Bulletin has learned that they started things off at the Irish Deli, ventured down to Louie’s and Nick’s, and of course… ended up on Valleydale for a little “show and tail.” As the midway point of the 2022 season gets closer and closer, it looks like the Cheetahs and Grenadiers are clearly two of the proverbial “teams to beat.”

Sloths Advance to 7-1 – Notch A.W. over Bellcows:

The other couple of “teams to beat,” are the Sloths and the Mayors. First for Muke’s Sloth Monsters: they completely and totally destroyed the Fieldstown Bellcows in Week 8 by the final score of 34-7. That qualifies as an official A.W., as Belrose’s team couldn’t get out of their own way on the gridiron this past Sunday. Meanwhile, the Three Toed Tree Dwellers moved to a BDFL-best 7-1 record on the season and look to be the closest challenger – at this point – to the Grey Beard Division teams that are running up pretty high point totals in 2022.

Mayors Mean Business – Mash Mark’s Mutts:

The Magic City Mayors are “right there” with the contenders. In fact, Mayor Arrington’s Cronies are atop the Total Points Standings. The Mayors dominated the Brookside Dogs in Week 8, by a final tally of 28-10. Mark’s Mutts were visibly distracted by all of the Halloween Weekend shenanigans in The Preserve. The Cronies took advantage of the situation and snuck into Brookside (where the game was played, and not The Preserve – that’s where the distractions were) and took care of the Dogs. The Bulletin has learned that the Mayors were “sky high” after another highly successful Saturday at the Old Grey Lady on Greymont Avenue with the annual Magic City Classic.

Blue Deacons Score 40 – Almost Close with A.W. vs. Blitz:

The Blue Deacons had a big weekend, even before gun season opened in the bowels of Blount County. The Heavy Duty Blount Squad (HDBS) scored at will in Week 8 and ran the Druid City Blitz off of the Hayden Hayfields on Sunday afternoon. It was one-point short of an A.W., with the final score on the ancient, wooden scoreboard reading 40-21, when the dirt-road, dust finally settled. The Gritz Blitz just wanted out of town and tried to take the loss in stride. The Bishops were pumped up with actually scoring 40-points and moving to a legitimate 4-4 record on the 2022 season.

Barry and Bandits Win Big – Boast A.W. over the BioCats:

The Altadena Bandits also moved to 4-4 on the year. Old Barry and his Bandits beat the BioCats by 23-points to record an A.W. in Week 8. The Western Hills Wildcats had no answers to the Bandits old-fashioned Ed Bruce offense. Barry’s team consistently ran away from motion from the flanker. His I-formation, one tight end attack ran fullback-lead power plays and “block down and kick out” off-tackle plays that the “James Gang” had no answer for from the first quarter until the fourth quarter. Old Barry even utilized some uniform/helmet changes… replacing the masked, black-hatted Bandit, with a script, cursive, “Bandits” on the side of the helmets, and Pony cleats. The A.W. loss earned the Mildcats with the “Toilet Seat Team of the Weak.”

Mean Machine Beats the Bullets:

In the closest game of the weekend, the Fairfield PowerSleds beat the Benton Bullets, 31-26. The five-point loss haunted the Bullets on a Halloween weekend, where a different “Defense” or “kicker” in the starting line-up would have probably given the Old Bullerino a vict’ry. Instead, the Bullets fall to 2-6 on the season, and lead the first un-official pucker factor polls as one of the first teams to fall out of contention under the… wait for it… Bullet Rule. Mad Jack and the Mean Machine were just happy to notch another win and give their loyal, metal heads something to cheer about as October turns to November and things start to get just a little more serious in the BDFL.

‘Dillos Top ‘Nauts:

The Duncanville Armadillos owe a debt to the Dreaded Schedule Maker. The little ol’ team from Texas only scored 18-points in Week 8, but they still escaped with a “W.” The ‘Dillos would have lost to 11 BDFL teams this past weekend, but they were matched up against the Jugtown Juggernauts, who scored a paltry, single-digit nine (9) on their way to an embarrassing home loss to K.P. & Company.

Meanwhile in the JrBDFL:

In the Junior League, the cyberspace wheel keeps spinning with thousands of fantasy leagues online through ESPN and other media entities. However, the JrBDFL is the only one associated with an old-school, points-only, old-fashioned, real, fantasy football league – the BDFL. It has been a “win-win” for all of the youth involved. It keeps ‘em off the streets and affords weekly competition. Per outside reports: Meredith, Hayden, and Wilks are 7-1 thus far in the junior league.

Tide QB Trio:

All three Alabama NFL quarterbacks won in Week 8. Mac Jones (New England) led the Patriots to vict’ry on the road against the Jets, Tua (Miami) had a big week throwing to former Tide Teammate Jaylen Waddle in a big Dolphins win, and Jalen Hurts (Eagles) leads the only undefeated team in the NFL. Hurts threw for four TDs to help Philadelphia move to 7-0. By the way, Bama QB Bryce Young will probably be the number one overall pick in 2023, and The Bulletin lists the early favorites to draft Young as: Las Vegas, Houston, News Orleans and Atlanta.

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