The Bulletin

The BDFL and the JrBDFL were well represented at the Cotton Bowl's CFP semi-finals in Arlington

Championship Set - Cheetahs and Mayors in Big Daddy Bowl XX:  

Cheetahs Slam Sleds in Semis: All they do is win.

The Southside Cheetahs won games all year long. It wasn’t pretty, but sometimes it was pretty. The Sin Wagon did whatever it took to win games all along the 2021 season. Whether it was a blow out, or a close game, or a four-overtime game, the Cheetahs took care of business. Butch Neal’s team didn’t mind throwing for 500-yards or running 10-times in a row. In 2021, the Cheetahs won low scoring games, high scoring games, and they won beauty pageants and ugly games. They won parades, cavalcades, carnivals and spectacles. The Sin Wagon then kept it rolling in the post-season. “It’s rolling baby,” is more than a phrase to the Cheetahs. In the semi-finals of the Big Daddy Championship Series, the Cheetahs defeated the Fairfield PowerSleds. Mad Jack’s “Mean Machine” had no answers for the Cheetahs, and when they thought they did – have answers – they went to the blackboard to work ‘em out in chalk, and found out that they were wrong. Butch continues to “make all the right moves,” and now the Cheetahs have one more mountain to climb to claim the BDFL Title.  

Mayors Flatten Freebirds – Advance to Big Daddy Bowl:

On the path to the summit in the Big Daddy Football League to face the Southside Cheetahs will be the Magic City Mayors. Alan Arrington’s Cronies bullied Bocephus in the BDCS semi-finals and notched pivotal and crucial vict’ry over the “upset minded” Fultondale Freebirds. The Mayors, who are always trying to annex small portions of Fultondale, to suit the ever-expanding economic interests of Birmingham, had no trouble pushing the F’birds around in Round Two of the BDCS. The actual game wasn’t exactly as close as the final score would indicate – actually it kind of was – but, The Bulletin is reporting that it didn’t seem to be that close to the fans, bystanders, media and other folks in attendance. So, the Big Daddy Bowl will feature a couple of “originals,” members of the BDFL’s stellar “Magnificent Seven,” in the Championship Game fighting it out for the coveted Grand Daddy Trophy, which signifies excellence in every manor. It’ll be an All-Birmingham Final. It’ll be played at the new BJCC Football Stadium in advance of the 2022 USFL 2.0 season to begin in a few months. However, the Stallions, Stars, Bandits, Gamblers, Panthers, Generals, Breakers, and Maulers will not generate near the excitement as the Big Daddy Bowl featuring the Cheetahs vs. the Mayors.  

The Bulletin Quotes All:

With all of the “other” games in Week 17 of the BDFL season taking a back seat to those two teams who are advancing to the Championship Game, The Bulletin is featuring a number of quotes - local quotes - from Gardendale, University of Alabama, and Metro Birmingham or Tuscaloosa area folks from the past in this week’s edition. It’s okay if you don’t recognize all of them, because they are intentionally kind of random and some go way back. And, just to see if you’re paying attention, The Bulletin will have a scale, or legend, or footnotes in next week’s edition to explain the quotes or at least put ‘em in some kind of context. Therefore, don’t let your subscription to The Bulletin or to TheBDFL.com expire… operators are standing by.  

“Yeah, I’m bad.”  

“I’d hit him in the head with a Coke bottle.”  

“Honey Badger… gets whatever he wants, right?

 I guess he wanted an @$$ whipping.”  

“I pay the rent here.”  

Hint: all the above quotes were said near 14th Avenue Townhouse Apts or by residents thereof.  

Bullets & Dogs to Decide the Mullet in Indianapolis:

It might be the “consolation bracket,” but the Dogs and Bullets have generated a lot of buzz in the Big Mullet Series (BMS). The Brookside Dogs knocked off the Blue Deacons, and the Benton Bullets scored a season-high 40-points in an upset rout of the BMS top-seeded Sloth Monsters in Round Two. Now, “Mark’s Mutts” and Bullet’s Bullets are aiming even higher. The Dogs and the Bullets have announced through Learfield Sports that the Title Contest in the Big Mullet Series will be played in Indianapolis on the Sunday prior to the CFP National Championship Game. The Synaflex Rubber Tycoon and former Super Banker aka Mr. Drysdale is not happy about being in the “loser’s bracket,” or about having to travel North for the CFP title game. On the flip side, the AISA’s top radio, small market, play-by-play announcer turned governmental spin doctor is also ticked off about not making the Big Dance and having to go to a very cold climate to witness the end of the college football season. Here comes the however, however… the Bullets and the Dogs have decided to play the Mullet Bowl in Indy and are allowing Learfield to broadcast the game in any manner the collegiate broadcasting giant determines is best for the BDFL and America in general.  

“You got man, and you got machine.”  

“Cut me some slack and I’ll cut you some slack.”  

“Dumb @$$ flunked out”  

Grenadiers Bounce Back – Bomb Blitz:

The Mineral Springs Grenadiers were shell-shocked, which is a damaging thing for a Bomb Squad, by their First Round, overtime, upset loss to the Freebirds. However, the Commissioner did not mope, except from a little while. Chris Hand did not wallow in self-pity, although he did feel a little sorry for himself. And, the Grenadiers did not dwell on their horrendous, choke-type loss in Week 16, but they did get the chicken bone out of their throats long enough to rebound with a vict’ry over the Druid City Blitz in Week 17.

“Think of another one.”  

“You gotta wheel.”  

“Five against one, that’s not a fair fight. Go get five or six more.”  

Gamblers Outscore Wildcats in Wild West Showdown:

In the other game, in the consolation portion of the BDCS, the Gulf Coast Gamblers and the Western Hills Wildcats put on a show in Round Two that would have made Jimmy “The Greek” Snyder (born: Dimetrios Georgios Synodinos) and Buffalo Bill (born: William Frederick Cody) proud. The Gambler and the Cowboy would have liked this one, other than it not being for anything substantial. At any rate, the Dixie Mafia and the “James Gang” battled for four quarters in a see-saw affair with guns a blazing, and the Gamblers managed to defeat the Wildcats in a game that would have been long-remembered if it was for a division, conference, league, or any other kind of significant prize, or title, or bragging rights of any kind other than the $2 per win BDFL fee.  

“Put your hand on the line”  

“Don’t mess ‘em up too bad, Big John”  

“I hope I don’t have to whip anybody else’s @$$ today.”  

Other Mullets – Two Winners and Two Losers:

To wrap up the week of action in the BDFL, down in the Big Mullet Series, the Jugtown Juggernauts were defeated by the Duncanville Armadillos and the Fieldstown Bellcows topped the Altadena Bandits.  

“Recon he can make it from there.”  

“That was fun. Let’s do it again.”  

“Are we gonna scout, or are we gonna party? We’re gonna scout. Hold this.”  

Week 17 the Jr BDFL - “It’s all about the kids.”

Meanwhile in the Junior League, Hayden Roberts (the face in the middle of the Hand Photo) had a big weekend in Texas at his first bowl game and holds a big lead with one week to go in the JrBDFL Championship Game against fellow Morgan Academy Class of ’22 rival Wade Mason. Matthew Hand is also in that class, but he is battling for third place, and Milton Hand and Meredith Hand (not pictured above) are battling to the end in a consolation capacity.  

“DuBose is gonna break one off in Spurrier.”  

“Chicago is in deep $#!&.”

W1TB  W2TB  W3TB  W4TB  W5TB  W6TB  W7TB  W8TB  W9TB  W10TB  W11TB  W12TB  W13TB  W14TB  W15TB  W16TB  W17TB