Bounty Hunter:

“My horse is kicking dust up off the trail.

I just getting’ back from a trip to hell.

Six-gun, she’s strapped by my side.

‘Thunder’ is the horse I ride.

And, it seems to me this is one hell of a way for a man like me to earn my pay.

Outlaws on the loose… running, running from the noose.”

“I’m a Bounty Hunter. I’ll hunt you down.”

Gator Country:

“Oh, Richard (Dickie) Betts will tell you lord, he was born a Ramblin’ Man.

He can ramble on back to Georgia, and I won’t give a #@%$.”

Flirtin’ with Disaster:

“I’m out of money, out of hope, it looks like self-destruction.

How much more can we take with all of this corruption.”

In Cat Fight – Cheetahs Claw Wildcats:

The first team to move to “Lucky 7” wins on the season in 2018 is the Southside Cheethas. The ramifications of getting that seventh vict’ry of the season are as follows, and I quote: you avoid a losing season, and you avoid getting knocked out of the Big Daddy Championship Series under the auspices of the Bullet Rule. So, the Cheetahs attained that lofty standard in only Week 8 of the season, moving to 7-1, by clawing the Western Hills Wildcats 45-15. Butch’s A.W. over the Wildcats illustrated how strong the Sin Wagon has been rolling this season, as they look to get their paws around the Grand Daddy Trophy just one more time. Meanwhile, the BioCats are probably celebrating another World Series title for BoSox along with the rest of their close friends in New England.

Dogs Dominate ‘Dillos:

The Brookside Dogs seemed to have turned the Tide on the banks of the Five Mile Creek. Mark’s Mutts got a morale-boosting one-point win a week ago, and rode that momentum to a big win this past weekend. The Dogs ventured to Duncanville, Texas in Week Eight to battle the Armadillos, and KP’s team barely put up a fight. The Ex-Super Banker and Synaflex CEO was able to dominate the ‘Dillos on their home field. The results of this match-up puts both teams at the old proverbial crossroads with identical records of 4-4 on the season, and it’ll be a testament to coaching – or the lack thereof – that gets these teams to the BDCS or the Big Mullet Series at the end of the year.

Sloth Monsters Slaughter Grenadiers:

The celebration was short for the Commissioner. His Mineral Springs Grenadiers got their first win of the season, last week, but proceeded to fall flat on their face in Week 8. Iron Hand’s team was slaughtered by the Silver Lakes Sloth Monsters in a game where folks from Coalburg, Republic, and Dog Town came to visit Mineral Springs only to leave win the home team disappointing once again. Meanwhile, the win moves the Three Toed Tree Dwellers up to 4-4 on the season and within striking distance of a place at the BDCS table when the BDFL season reaches its zenith and the dual post-season brackets.

Woosiers Fall to PowerSleds:

In a highly anticipated matchup between a pair of 4-3 teams that had been trending upward in the computer rankings and Sagarin polls and hot stove talk at the local Jiffy Chek, the Fairfield PowerSleds proved to be too much for the Smoke Rise Woosiers on the gridiron. Mad Jack and his Mean Machine had no trouble traversing into the bowels of Blount County to get an important vict’ry in Week 8 of the BDFL season. So, Jack moves to 5-3 on the season with the 31-22 win, and the Woo Crew falls to 4-4, and in ever=present danger of falling below the .500 mark (and everybody knows what that means even without a reference in the Bulletin to the Bullet Rule).

‘Naut Today – or Monday Night – Bullets Beaten by Two:

Tom Brady is the GOAT. Just don’t look for him to get you three points on Monday Night Football, when you trail by two after Sunday, and all you need is Brady to throw one cotton-picking TD pass against the woeful Buffalo Bills. Oh, Brady will throw for 324-yards and lead his team to a 25-6 whipping of the Bills for the 1,000 time in his career, and on Monday Night to boot, but where it counts in the BDFL scoreboard, he comes up with a Big Zero, and the Bullets end up losing by two to the bottom-dwelling Jugtown Juggernauts, 27-25. It’s just the second win of the season for the ‘Nauts, but it’s enough to keep hope alive for A.E., who has had a very bad start to here 2018 season in the BDFL.

Mayors Earn Bonehead in Loss to Dorians:

The Magic City Mayors picked up the “Bonehead of the Week,” award in Week 8, not starting Sammy Watkins (missed 6-points) and losing by four points to the Altadena Dorians by the final score of 34-31. Upon further review, and some Gardendale Round School simple subtraction, that’s actually a three-point loss for the Cronies (of the City – Birmingham) as opposed to the Cronies (of the County – Jefferson), a.k.a. the Dorians. So, with the bureaucratic red-tape flying in every imaginable direction, and the game going back-and-forth for four quarters (which still makes a dollar), the Dorians were able to pull out the vict’ry over the Mayors in a semi-Magic City Classic. And, if you are looking for parity in the BDFL, you’ve come to the right place – after the results and recount of this one – both the Mayors and the Dorians are 4-4 on the season and in striking distance of both the BDCS and the Big Mullet Series.

Gamblers Top Blitz 24-16:

Has the Bulletin used this one before? Have anyone ever seen Kenny Breal and Jerry Fritz in the same room, at the same time? In the Separated at Birth Bowl, the Gulf Coast Gamblers battled the Druid City Blitz, and many of the spectators couldn’t tell the two teams apart. Both ran the same version of the spread offense and both lined up in nickel but covered like they were in a two deep safety look with “sky” and “cloud” coverages, and rolling the secondary. Even the teams looked like they had on the same uniforms. “Yeah, I’ve actually seen ‘em in the same room, at the same time,” said one eye witness, referring to Kenny B. & Jerry F. “They do look a little alike, except one is always scowling and the other is grinning like an idiot.” No more information was given as to which one was frowning and which one was smiling. The Bulletin rests its case. Oh, the game… they sloshed around enough… and muddled around long enough for the Gamblers to actually beat the Blitz, 24-16. Actually, it looks like the Gamblers beat the Blitz with slants and screens.

Bishop Wins HDBS Bowl:

In the Heavy Duty Bull$#!& Bowl, the Mt. High Blue Deacons defeated the Black Creek Freebirds, 31-29, in a game played pretty close to Turkey Creek, between a couple of real turkeys. It was a close game from the opening kickoff until the final gun, which was used to shoot at some whitetails even before the official start of gun season. Reports are still sketchy coming from that neck of the woods, but apparently Bishop and his Hayden District Bishop Squad was able to wade through more of the HDBS than the Freebirds, who got their wings sopped in the slop and no one was around with any of the blue Dawn that they use to get the grease off of the seagulls. So, Bishop beat Bocephus and the loss could be devastating to the F’birds. The Southern Rockers may have the top point total (293), but they are now 3-5 on the season and close to being eliminated from the Big Dance under the “you know who” Rule. Old Anthony, meanwhile, is 5-3, and drinking that free bubble-up and eating that rainbow stew.

WEEK 8 in the Jr BDFL - “It’s all about the kids.”

In the Jr. BDFL, the Winston County Walkers were ‘high point man’ rolling up 72-points in a big win over the Onion Turtles. The Hooks & Lures won in OT over the Benton Butterflies, and even though the Selma Southpaws lost to the Rebel City Netters, they still held onto first place in the Total Points Standings. The scores from Week 8, and the overall standings are below. Thank you very little.

Jr. BDFL Week 8 Scores: