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THE OFFICIAL INTERNET SITE OF THE BIG DADDY FOOTBALL LEAGUE |
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TheBDFL.net THE BULLETIN Week 15 |
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Inside The BDFL
Bullet's Quote of Week "The Dolodome and all of Fairfield cheer in joyful jubilation when ‘ere they hear Mad Jack call ‘em by name, “Now Ozzie, now Marilyn, now Edgar and Johnny,* on Dee,** on Judas, on Donnie and Ronnie,*** to the top of the Dolodome, above the smoke of Fairfield, now dash away, dash away, dash away all!”
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From Underneath The Rock in Media Void By Bullet Head Week
15 in the BDFL... Cheetahs
Rolling Big Daddy
(Biloxi)—The
Sin Wagon is “rolling baby,” on a collision course with the Big
Daddy Bowl. Mike Price’s
Dancing Darlings ventured over from the friendly confines of Artey’s
Angels in Pensacola, across the state line into Mississippi.
There they gambled and danced the night away at the expense of
the Gamblers. Kenny “B”
was helpless to stop the Fancy Felines who are just a couple of wins
away from their 1st ever BDFL Championship.
Upon returning to Alabama, Butch and Company were shouting
“we’re number one, and dancing and singing and moving to the
grooving.” Tribe
Scalps Brother
(Benton)—Kawliga
practically wrapped up the Green Horn Division title weeks ago, but he
is still making some of the former Champions “feel the burn.”
The Tomahawks torched the Boys from Benton on Sunday down in
Lowndes County and then ventured over to the banks of the Alabama River
to celebrate with some old-time Creeks at Holy Ground Campground where
hundreds of Injuns were massacred 150 years ago.
They believed they couldn’t be defeated on what was considered
at the time, Native American “holy ground,” but with their backs to
the river and no way to cross, retreat or escape, they were wiped out.
(Protestant churches have fish fries there now twice a year.)
Bullet suffered this time around as the Tribe got revenge, but
the Bullerino attempted to salvage a moral vict’ry afterwards by
saying, “Well, we beat them up there on the reservation earlier this
year. We’ll take the
split, go to Burger King and regroup.” Merlin
in Oz With Win Against Tree-Dwellers
(Lake
Cyrus)—It was hard to tell who was who up at Lake Cyrus
this weekend. It looked
like a rerun of the Wizard of Oz. (Merlin’s
favorite movie, we are told.) There
was “one without a brain, one without a heart, and one without any
courage.” Or, maybe both
teams had all of the above. However,
inspired with the “melting of the wicked witch,” (Mukes in Drag) the
Wizards were able to tote away a vict’ry at a place where they met
their most “heart-wrenching” defeat last year in the
Big Daddy Bowl. As the
Pixie Dusters pulled out of Lake Cyrus, you could hear Merlin paying
tribute to his idol, the Wizard of Oz, “We’re off to see the wizard.
The wonderful wizard of oz, we hear he is a wiz of a wiz, it ever
a wiz there was, if ever if ever a wiz there was, the Wizard of Oz is
one because, because, because, because… because of the wonderful
things he does.” Over
the Rainbow, Aides Win
(Green
Springs)—The Bootleggers got a Toby Keith “boot in the @$$,” for
leaving No Teeth and trying to bring their “C-game” to George Ward
Memorial. The Banana Eaters
had been saving up for weeks to “un-coil” on the unsuspecting Whisky
Runners, and the Johnnys didn’t disappoint a packed house. It has been a roller coaster season for the old Commish this
year. Protests have been at
a minimum from the BDFL rank and file, but he has had to deal with a
mediocre Grenades team with a lot of “dissention,” and some rampant
“lack of competitive spirit,” in some sections of the league.
Still a win over the Tennessee Suckers gave Johnny a reason to
flex and get ready for Big Daddy Bowl/Day and Super Bowl Sunday. Woo
Crew Smokes Cronies
(Magic
City)—Woo’s excellent road trip led him to Fair Park this weekend
and the fair wasn’t even in town.
So, the Blount County Country Bumpkins took out their frustration
on the defending BDFL Champion Cronies.
The Woo Crew beat the Mayors and then bullied them into giving
him plenty of free passes to VisionLand, the McWane Center and the SWAC
Championship Game at Legion Field.
After spending the weekend in the Magic City and getting a big
vict’ry over the Mayors, Woo settled back into life in the boonies,
humming, “Green Acres is the place for me. Farm living is the life for me.
Land stretching out far and wide, take Manhattan, but give me the
country life.” Dogs
Bury the Sickles
(Pelham)—Mark’s
Mutts continued their strong finish by adding to the Blades late season
collapse. The Dogs rolled into North Shelby County and proceeded to
beat the Blades like an old yard dog.
A protest-free season has paid off in some ways for the Dogs,
however they are capable at any time of joining hands and singing “Kumbaya.”
As for the Section 69 Sickles, this was supposed to be a breakout
season, but they were never really able to get the oil and gas mixture
just right for their Poulan Industrial Strength Weed-Eater to work
properly. Rumor has it they
are contemplating a return to CPAism. Fairfield
Rocks Around the Christmas Tree
(Fairfield)—“Bang
your head! Mental Health will drive you wild!” shouted the Sledheads
after taking the Juggernaut Girls to the woodshed known as the Dolodome,
this weekend. As you know,
the Power Sled is not pulled by eight tiny reindeer, but by an all-star,
metal cast that makes you wonder why they don’t finish first every
year, especially in the old, geezer, Gray Beard Division.
The Dolodome and all of Fairfield cheer in joyful jubilation when
‘ere they hear Mad Jack call ‘em by name, “Now Ozzie, now Marilyn,
now Edgar and Johnny,* on Dee,** on Judas, on Donnie and Ronnie,*** to
the top of the Dolodome, above the smoke of Fairfield, now dash away,
dash away, dash away all!” *
Edgar and Johnny – the Winter Brothers **
Dee is Dee Snider of Twisted Sister ***
Donnie and Ronnie – two of the three Van Zant Brothers |
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Gray Beard Division
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Mayors | Bootleggers
| Gamblers | Grenades
| Woosiers | Cheetahs
| PowerSleds Green Horn Division | Wizards | Sloth Monsters | Blades | Juggernauts | Bullets | Dogs | Wooden Warriors |
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