The Bulletin

Week 3: Reduce, Reuse and Recycle

The Bulletin is your source for weekly game summaries:

Here’s The Bulletin for Week Three 2026: Volume 32, Number 3.

“Two’s company… Three’s a crowd.” The Bulletin is Urging Everyone to Stay Connected with the Coaches Connection:

Tuesday night’s from 6 – 7:30, catch the BDFL’s Bullet on 100.9, AlexFM with this high school football coaches show. You won’t regret it. The program is also available world wide on a livestream. Check it out. You won’t regret it.   Week Three in the BDFL – the 3 R’s of Education: Reading, Writing, and Arithmetic It seems that this is actually one “R,” one “W,” and one “A.” No wonder there’s a problem in the educational system in the U.S. It does contain a “W” and an “A” that could stand for “Win,” or if you reversed them, and “A.W.” as in an @$$-whippin in the BDFL. We’ll get to the wins and the A.W.’s in a moment. The best Public Relations use of the “Three R’s” is in the environmental world where it means “Reduce, Reuse, and Recycle.” This is how it’s done. Reduce – limit the amount of junk you obtain in the first place. Reuse – use that stuff over and over again. Recycle – send that stuff to a recycling center instead of a landfill. R R R – now on to the Week Three game reports…  

Mean Machine Rolls – Beats Bandits:

The Bulletin begins with a “Trio” of games in Week Three that featured “Three” different outcomes. That’s right, it was a “Trifecta” of various results that were formed by statistical factors, analytical data, and unforeseen circumstances that brought some teams to vict’ry, some to defeat, and others to outright embarrassment. Inside the friendly confines of Jefferson County, the Fairfield PowerSleds ran head-to-head against the Altadena Bandits. The Mean Machine and the Black TransAm with the T-Tops could not steer-clear of each other in this Week Three showdown in the BDFL. The collision was drastic, but the results not totally unexpected, as the Sleds did a number on the Bandits. That’s the difference between Birmingham Steel and Detroit alloys, as the Sleds fly to a 47-28 vict’ry.  

Fritz Triumphs – Blitzes Bellcows:

The embarrassment is real for the Fieldstown Bellcows, who have now fallen to 0-3 in the BDFL. It’s been a long three weeks for “Super Dave,” and his heifers. This past weekend, the BellHeads were blitzed by daBlitz. The Bellcows were stopped at every access point and gate and turnstile and couldn’t even get out in the pasture gridiron to properly take on the “Gritz Blitz.” Jerry Fritz’s team did not look like “world beaters,” but they didn’t have to be to upend the Bellcows by the final score of 19-16, in what was described online as a “snoozer.”  

Hime Still Looks Strong – Bashes Bullets:

Bullet’s week in the Big Daddy Football League started out bad on Thursday Night and then got exceedingly worse as the NFL games stretched out until Monday Night. It was a long and grinding road to an “L.” The Benton Bullets got a little bit of a reprieve with a big Morgan Academy vict’ry on Friday night for homecoming in what was a “carnival atmosphere,” from one end of Selma to the other. Then on Saturday, the BDFL pain went away as the action moved to T-Town for the Tide’s 49-18, A.W. of South Carolina. All of the Hand Brothers apparently brought “vict’ry chicken” to the tailgate, and that’s usually a winning combination. On Sunday, the undefeated Black Crick Freebirds unleashed some tail-whippin’ on Bullet. The Freebirds flew past the Bullets, who could only manage single digits and were just glad it was over, and that it didn’t end in an A.W., although it felt like one. As a consolation prize, the Bullets picked up the “Toilet Seat Team of the Weak,” award and play to display it at the historic Tally Ho restaurant in Selma at the Bullerino’s weekly high school football coaches show on the local radio. “Old sportscasters never die… they just resurface in a smaller market.”  

Go Grenadiers – Commish Bites Dogs:

In the upper echelon of Bryant-Denny Stadium on Saturday, was National Alumni President Mark Burr and Learfield Executive Chris Hand. Most of the time, the silver spoons like to stay above the fray down on Saban Field and the cheap seats near the goal line. The Dogs and Grenadiers had to cut their hob-nobbing time short on Saturday night, when they realized they were playing each other on Sunday in the BDFL. The defending champions didn’t hold back in Week Three in the best fantasy football league around, as they tried to outclass the Commissioner in a relatively close game. “Imagine that,” said an innocent bystander, “Brookside outclassing Mineral Springs.” In a good philanthropic mood before the BDFL contest, Dog handed out Dow Chemical anti-biotic wipes and Synaflex pens. Mr. Mark Burr always said he’d make a great philanthropist. “I would give to people, and then they would owe me bigtime.” However, “Mark’s Mutts” could not close the deal, and ended up like George Costanza, with pointing at him and saying, “he’s the loser.” The Grenadiers moved to 3-0 by biting the Dogs, 24-21, in a close one.  

Sin Wagon Rolls – Flattens Sloths:

The elder statesman of the BDFL – Mr. Butch Neal – thought he could just roll his helmet out on the field and his old vintage Number-22 Gardendale High School jersey, and pick up a vict’ry over Mukes in the BDFL this past weekend. The Southside Cheetahs rolled out on the cyber gridiron in the Sin Wagon, but it was slowed considerably by some sloths crossing the road. It turned out to be some kind of “Trojan Horse” plot by the Sloth Monsters to try and get a win in fantasy football. The ploy worked for a while as the Tree Toed Tree Dwellers slinked out to an early lead. But, the Sloths could not hold onto the lead. Do you know why the Sloth Monsters could not “hold on” to the lead. Well, they don’t have opposable thumbs, they only have three fingers (claws) and they really don’t have much of a grip. Butch & Company came back, got the win, 35-33, and stayed among the ranks of the unbeaten at 3-0.  

Mayors Make Statement – Show Vulcans Who is Boss:

Guess who else moved up to 3-0 on the season? That’s right, the Magic City Mayors. The old cronies looked lost at times in this new-look Magic City Classic. The Nawf Birmingham Vulcans came to play on Sunday afternoon at Legion Field in Birmingham. But, who runs the city? That’s right, Mayor Arrington. He’s still in charge, and as long as he’s got the steering wheel of the city, you can bet he’s not going to let in “up-and-comers,” or any “young, but naïve,” people tell him how to get things done. It was close. Nic Hand’s team played their guts out, but the Vulcans came up one-point short as the Mayors “getter done,” 41-40.     

Naut Today – Juggernauts Turn Away Gamblers:

“Not today,” said Allyson Edwards, as she halted the Dixie Mafia’s entry into Gardendale on Sunday. Outwardly, the Jugtown Juggernauts stood on the strength of Mayor Stan Hogeland and the town’s “city ordinances” to not allow gambling in the community. The Gulf Coast Gamblers were stymied. They were at a loss as to what to do to counter the move by the ‘Nauts. Secretly, and behind the scenes, there was a contingent or organization of some of Gardendale’s past and present “celebrities,” or Quail Ridge Contingent that wasn’t going to put up with any outside influence from the Dixie Mafia. The Bulletin can neither confirm nor deny that either these people or their descendants were instrumental in turning the “unwanted element,” away: Roddyy Gorman, Dabo Johnson, Verle Marshall, and Robert Maldonado. (Bucket, Cazola, and The Crusher were not involved…) as the Nauts won by one.     

Short – Who Said That?

The Duncanville Armadillos are giddy these days with a new grand daughter and the Alabama starting quarterback from Duncanville, Texas, being 4-0. So, the BDFL is on the back-burner for K.P. & Company, and the ‘Dillos “came up short,” in Week Three in the nation’s premiere fantasy football league. The team that has “come up short,” earlier in the season, the “James Gang,” was up to the task this past weekend, and the Western Hills Wildcats notched a 33-28 vict’ry over the ‘Dillos. NOTE: nowhere in this article did the Bulletin, the Bulletin staff, The Bulletin sponsors, or anyone associated with the BDFL call K.P. or Jerry James “short.”  

“It’s all about the kids” - Week Three in the JrBDFL:

The Bulletin couldn’t get any straight answers out of the youth of the Junior League this week, so… it’ll just stand like this after Week Three. Meredith Hand’s opening season two-game winning streak came to a close, and in a brother battle… it appears the Lowndes County Labs defeated the Selma Southpaws. The research is up to you to figure out which team is which in the JrBDFL. The Bulletin can report that the Junior Leaguers started an NHL fantasy league.  

Coaches Connection:

One step above media void is the thriving central Alabama local radio market. Many call it the Black Belt. But, there’s a “hidden gem” there called the 50,000 watt blow torch of WALX-HD1, also known as 100.9 AlexFM. It features rock-n-roll and the BDFL’s own Bullet, with high school football on Friday nights and the Coaches Connection program on Tuesday Nights. Those programs feature ringing endorsements from BDFLers Mad Jack Barnes & Jammin’ Jaimie Hand, “hey, if you ain’t got nothing to do, it’s better than doing nothing.”