The Bulletin

Week 9: Flirtin’ with Disaster...

Vulcans and Bandits on the brink

Ladies and Gentlemen… Epic Recording Artists… Molly Hatchet!

The Bulletin is contractually obligated under old deals, agreements, arrangements, and hand-shake situations, to dedicate one issue per season to the southern rock group, Molly Hatchet. What better week than Week Nine of the Big Daddy Football League to highlight this band from Jacksonville, Florida, which continues to play around the country and abroad. Yes. They are still together and still rocking. The band is far from it’s original line-up, but some of the guys that joined in the 1980s and 90s have been in long enough to keep the group’s name and tour. Molly Hatchet formed in the early 1970s, and they have a number of songs on almost every list of the “Greatest Southern Rock Songs” of all time. “Flirtin’ with Disaster” is almost always in the Top Ten. “Dreams I’ll Never See,” is usually next and has climbed the list over the years and has even passed the original version that was written and previously recorded by the Allman Brothers. After the Top 20, the lists kind of vary… but these Hatchet songs are listed in some form or fashion before you get to number 100: Bounty Hunter, Gator Country, and Whiskey Man. So, enjoy The Bulletin with a few Hatchet lyrics mixed in to keep you on your toes.

Bandits Surpass Disaster Level at 1-8 with A.W. Loss vs. Wildcats:

--“No time to turn my head away… I’m flirtin’ with disaster every day.”--

The Altadena Bandits would have to improve to get “up” to the level of disaster. Yes, the Bandits have been worse than a disaster in 2025 in the BDFL. Old Barry’s team is at the bottom of the totem pole – the part that is under the ground – through the first half of the fantasy football season. In Week Nine, the Bandits dropped to a league-worst record of 1-8, and an overall point total that is the lowest of the 16 BDFL franchises. To add insult to injury, the Bandits absorbed an A.W. at the hands of the Western Hills Wildcats. The “James Gang” opened up and industrial sized can of whoop-@$$, and poured it all over the Black Trans Am’s right through the open T-Tops. It was a mess. At this point in the season, the Bandits are in disarray, and the BioCats look like they might be contenders.  

Vulcans Lose Again – This Time to daBlitz:

--“I feel like I’m dragging a heavy load.”--

Next from the cellar up in the BDFL, is the North Birmingham Vulcans. Nic Hand’s “young but naïve,” big-@$$ brass statues are in a world of hurt in 2025. The Defending Champions have seen their season go from bad-to-worse in recent weeks. In Week Nine in fantasy football, the Vulcans actually managed to score 27-points, but they still lost, and in the process, dropped to 2-7 on the season. The Druid City Blitz are the ones that earned this vict’ry with a consistent performance, substantial execution, and a score of 37-points. The Fritz Gritz Blitz showed the rest of the league that on any given weekend in the BDFL, they can tally points and win football games in the cyber world of fantasy football, especially in a points-only league.  

Gamblers Dominated by Cheetahs:

--“I’m out of money, out of hope, it looks like self destruction…”--

Neal beats Breal. The Gulf Coast Gamblers ran out of money and out of luck against the Southside Cheetahs this past weekend in the BDFL. The Sin Wagon rolled over the Dixie Mafia, 39-21, in a game that looked, smelled, and presented as an A.W., but was not an officially sanctioned A.W., because it fell 3-points short of the 21-point margin that defines an A.W. in the BDFL. But, let the record show, and the Bulletin illustrate - that it was destruction for the Gamblers in Week Nine in this fantasy football league. However, it’s not all bad news for the “Real Deal” Kenny Breal. His team is still on top of the standings in the Rugged Red Neck Division. Meanwhile, things are even better for Butch Neal. His Cheetahs picked up another vict’ry to move to 6-3 on the season, and the Sin Wagon remains the Top Team in Total Points, and if the Big Daddy Championship Series started tomorrow, they would be the Number One Seed, and one of the favorites to win the ultimate prize… the Grand Daddy Trophy.  

Bullets Boast Brother Bowl “W”:

--“We got the pedal to the floor our lives are runnin’ faster.”--

The Benton Bullets took a long trip to north and west Jefferson County on Sunday, and it paid off. The Bullet Mobile veered off of Interstate 65 on to I-22, and then through parts of Coalburg, Adamsville, Graysville, Republic, and Brookside… before traversing Dog Town to stop into Minerals Springs for the next edition of the BDFL’s Brother Bowl. On the other sideline were the Grenadiers on their home field. But, the home field advantage did not work out for the Commissioner. The Bullets were able to shoot straight long enough to put a few holes in the Grenadiers, and then the Old Bullerino was able to sneak out of town with a 34-22 vict’ry. In the match-up of brothers that entered the weekend with identical 4-4 records… the Bullets improved to 5-4, and the Commissioner’s team slipped to 4-5.  

Dogs Bow in Brookside to Bocephus:

--“We got our sights set straight ahead, but I ain’t sure what we’re after.”--

In the same neck of the woods, the top teams in the Green Horn and the Yellow Hammer Divisions met on the banks of the Five Mile Creek at Brookside Ballpark. It was a close, and low-scoring game… but the Fultondale Freebirds made enough plays down the stretch to top the Brookside Dogs, 23-15. The F’birds are still under .500 at 4-5 on the season, but it appears “Jammin’ Jaimie’s” team is headed in the right direction with the 3rd highest point total in the BDFL. “Mark’s Mutts” are a comfortable 6-3 on the season, despite the loss in Week Nine. Both teams ventured to the VFW across the railroad tracks and later to Wayne’s Place on Main Street in Brookside to talk about the old days and wait for the traffic to clear from the Russian Orthodox Church. Jaimie was not happy with the lack of Hank Williams Jr. quotes in The Bulletin, so he inserted his own into his post-game comments. “Tell me… why do you drink? Why do you roll smokes? Why do you live out the songs that you wrote?”  

Bellcows Beat Mayors:

--“I don’t know about yourself or what you plan to be.”--

The game between the Fieldstown Bellcows and the Magic City Mayors took place in the middle of things at Legion Field in Birmingham. Before the match-up of Bell Heads and Cronies, the Magic City Classic took place at the Old Gray Lady… and after the game… the Morgan Academy Senators will make their first-ever trip to the venerable stadium for a game against the Banks Academy Jets in Round One of the Playoffs in the Alabama Independent School Association. It could turn out to be a movie with an emphasis on the media coverage and broadcast of the game on the radio and also livestreaming. The game is Thursday, November 6 at 7pm. Meanwhile, back to the contest between Belrose and Alan Arrington, the Mayors couldn’t seem to get on track after spending too much time at the pre-game festivities at the Tide and Tiger. Belrose took the vict’ry in stride, then found that his vehicle was not where he left it following the game, and he had to hitch a ride back to nearby Fultondale.  

Sloth Monsters Top ‘Nauts in Jugtown:

--“When we gamble with the times we choose our destiny.”--

Don’t bet against Mukes at Rocket Stadium at Driver Field in Gardendale on the first weekend in November. The Sloth Monsters are always tough on the field where Ed Bruce, Dale Cook, and Alan Pridmore strode the sidelines in the 1970s and 80s. The Jugtown Juggernauts found this out the hard way losing to the Three Toed Tree Dwellers by the final score of 20-13. The loss drops Allyson to 4-5 on the season, and in firm control of last place in the Yellow Hammer Division. The “Son of Slim” is a game below that in the win-loss column at 3-6, but Mukes is hopeful that his team will turn things around and begin a stretch run that will turn the Sloths from pretenders to contenders.  

Sleds Deal Defeat to ‘Dillos:

--“Yeah we’re travelin’ down this lonesome road…”--

The Duncanville Armadillos are still bad. The ‘Dillos won a couple of games after a horrible start, but the “Lil o’ team from Texas” (by way of Charlotte) has reverted to early-season form. K.P.’s team effort earned them the “Toilet Seat Team of the Weak” award in Week Nine in the BDFL. The Armadillos scored only 6-points in getting embarrassed by the Fairfield PowerSleds. The “Mean Machine” finally got a break from the Dreaded Schedule Maker. The Sleds only scored 16-points… but, they won easily by 10 against the moribund ‘Dillos.  

“It’s all about the kids.” - Week Nine in the JrBDFL:

--“Feel like I’m draggin’ a heavy load.”--

The JrBDFLers are going in droves to Spotify, YouTube, and Apple Music to listen to Molly Hatchet, and check upcoming concert dates. The band is playing some gigs on the west coast before spending the rest of 2025 in Europe, where they still sell out medium-sized venues. Bop, bop, bop, yeah!