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 The
Bulletin - Week 4
From underneath a rock in Media Void
“Fo, fo, fo!”
41 Hut Hut: Bullets Score 41… and Lose
The Benton Bullets scored in all almost all facets of the game this
weekend, tallied up 41-points, and still lost. That’s what happens
sometimes in Fantasy Land, and the big beneficiary is the Red Neck
Division rival, Gulf Coast Gamblers. The Real Deal ripped off a weekly
best score of 58 in route to ripping the Bullets a new one along the Red
Neck Riviera. We’re going fast this week on the Bulletin, and things are
never good for the publication and the beloved Bullets lose, but at
least they looked good doing it.
Wooden Warriors Win over Wizards
Well, not since 1988, when Jaimie joined Johnny Ball, Bullet, and Light
(and others) in a three city limo tour to bars and night spots in
Clearwater, St. Petersburg, and Tampa has old Kawliga had so much fun in
Tampa Town. Not that he did so with Parks, who was apparently once again
delayed by some unexpected events at a local K-Mart. It was beating
Parks’ Pasco County Wizards that gave Hime reason to celebrate. The
Black Creek Wooden Warriors took their game outside the Fultondale City
Limits and outside the State of Alabama, and left the Bay area reeling.
Merlin, who’s season is now teetering on the brink of disaster, has
calls in to Pat Dye, Neil Calloway, Larry Blakeney, and Wayne Hall, to
see if any of them can help the Wizards get back on the right track.
Good Luck with that. By the way, by the Bulletin’s math, the Woodies are
4-0 (matching – I’m quite sure, his other league team), but it hasn’t
really turned cold yet.
Sleds Slip Past Dogs
In the Stroh’s Light Game of the Week, Mad Jack’s Mean Machine proved to
be too much for Mark Burr’s Brookside Bulldogs. The PowerSleds have
searched with little success this season for the “power that made them
famous,” kind of like the Beer that Made Milwaukee famous, or the Fish That
Saved Pittsburgh. In other words, it has been tough for the Bed Pan
Bunch (that’s PowerSleds). However, a trip to Brookside, while not
always a tonic for “what ails you,” it can surely help you get a BDFL
vict’ry. Dogs Null Set Club can be dangerous at times (especially with
an old-fashioned, empty Coke bottle). But, more times that not… the
visitors at least leave the Banks of the Five Mile Creek with a win.
Woo Crew Edges Bonehead Mayors
A colossal Bonehead mistake by the Mayors cost them 18-points in Week
Four, helped them earn the “Bonehead of the Week Award,” and contributed
mightily to their one-point, nail-biting loss to the Smoke Rise Woosiers.
And to quote Forest Gump (who is from Green Bow, Alabama – read Bayou La
Batre – and not Blount County), “that’s all I got to say about that.”
Sloths Slam Slovaks
“Did the Slovaks win this week,” asked a random Slovak on the streets of
Bratislava. “No!” came the quick reply from the newspaper, Kielbasa
vendor, who answered without even looking up. “They lost to the Sloth
Monsters. Now, we are 0-4.” The dejection was written all in the tone of
the Slovak Nation, as they have watched their beloved Slovaks start the
season without a win. Times are now tougher than ever in Slovakia,
imagine that. “It’s like we’re behind the Iron Curtain all over again.”
The reply, “yep, it’s exactly the same, just different.”
Commissioner Steals a Win
If you ever come up against the Commissioner in a “tie game,” remember
this old adage: “the ties goes to the Commissioner.” Allyson found that
out the hard way in Week Four, losing to the Grenadiers by none.
Alert the Presses – Cheetahs Lose
You know the BDFL World is turned upside down if the Cheetahs lose. And,
if they lose to the lowly Blitz, get ready for Armageddon. Later… The
Bulletin (we’re busy getting ready)
Where are they now?
Willie Wyatt – Wyatt now coaches high school football as a varsity
defensive line coach at Spain Park High School in Hoover, Alabama. He is
also the head coach of the Spain Park High School wrestling team. Willie
Wyatt (born September 27, 1967 in Birmingham, Alabama) was an Arena
Football League player who played offensive lineman/defensive lineman
for the Detroit Drive in 1993 and the Tampa Bay Storm from 1995–1999,
and again in 2001. He wore #55 for the Storm. He also played for the Tampa Bay
Buccaneers of the National Football League in 1990. Wyatt played high
school football at Gardendale High School in Gardendale, Alabama.
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