Dogs Bark and Bite ‘Nauts, 21-13

Speaking of dogs, the Brookside Dogs shook off a feeble Week One to rebound in the second weekend of the season. Mark’s Mutts defeated the Jugtown Juggernauts 21-13 to improve to 1-1 in 2020. The Dogs are not asking for forgiveness and they are not apologizing for continuing their basking from their 2019 championship into a new season. It was a long time in coming – the Brookside Dogs 1st BDFL Championship – and they plan to continue celebrating right up until the point where someone pries the Grand Daddy Trophy out of their cold, dead, hands.

Bellcows Moo to 2-0 with A.W.

Look who is undefeated after two weeks in 2020, it’s the Belrose Bellcows. And, they got there (to 2-0) in “high style” in Week Two with an old-fashioned, woodshed-type, A.W. over the Benton Bullets. At one point, it was 42-0, before the Bell-Heads started calling off the dogs, and the Bullet sent out texts basically conceding. But, the Benton Bullets did try to avoid the A.W., by scoring some points in the 3pm games and on Monday Night Football, but it was not meant to be. Would-be sooth-sayers said it was karma for The Bulletin running down the Bellcows for their 13-12 vict’ry in Week One, but the only evidence found linked to firing up the B’Cows was a line from the official BDFL email: “No teams really sucked in Week 1 except for the Blue Deacons and Bellcows who played a 13-12 contest in Week 1 that set the league back a few years.”

Blitz Top Biocats, 38-30, to Move to 2-0

The Druid City Blitz and the mostly Western Hills Wildcats battled back-and-forth this past weekend, with pride and prestige on the line in their Yellow Hammer Division match-up. It ended up begin a see-saw, now-you-see-me, now-you-don’t type of “smoke and mirrors” game, where the Blitz ended up winning and moving to 2-0 on the season, while the losers – the Biocats – fell to an embarrassing 0-2 and into a deep hole that they may not be able to climb out of in 2020.

Commish Falls to Undefeated Cheetahs

The Southside Cheetahs took advantage of another “Saturday off” without college football (real college football, Bama, SEC, etc.) to rest up and then came out firing on Sunday afternoon in NFL fantasy football action. The Sin Wagon rolled to a relatively easy vict’ry over the Commissioner and his Grenadiers, by the final score of 24-12. The Cheetahs could be a real contender again in 2020, with an early 2-0 record, while the Grenadiers barely escaped the worst point total in Week Two by a single point and plan to go back to the Ed Bruce chalk board in Week Three, after looking “turrible, just turrible,” this past Sunday.

Freebirds Dump Deacons, 25-11

It was the Blue Deacons who had the lowest point total in Week Two, and “won” the ‘Toilet Seat Team of the Weak’ award (for the 2nd straight week.) Hime Hand’s Black Creek Freebirds were the beneficiaries to the Heavy Duty Bishop Squad’s complete and total meltdown this past weekend. The F-Birds were victims of SPL (beep Pot Luck) in the first week of the season, losing a gut-wrenching OT game, but they rebounded by pounding the Blue Deacons in the second week of the season. Bishop has a lot of players hurt and is already in an 0-2 hole and the 2020 season could quickly get away from him if he doesn’t re-group and re-group quickly up in southwest Blount County.

Mayors Outscore Sleds in Pivotal Election Year Matchup

The ballet box results – along with the scoreboard – read Mayors 36, PowerSleds 29 at the end of this game at Legion Field. Alan Arrington and Jack Barnes were there at the Old Gray Lady early and stayed late, not only to play a BDFL game, but to help with the filming of Woodlawn II. A sneak peak of the movie, chronicles how the prestigious Birmingham area high school basically didn’t do anything note-worthy since Tony Nathan graduated and a long series of Mayors, from Arrington to Lowrey, let the city’s sports programs dry up and blow away along with the old upper deck from Legion Field.

Gamblers Hit 21 – Top ‘Dillos in Blackjack - 21-18

You gotta know when to hold ‘em and know when to fold ‘em, but you also have to know when to wheel, when to split, and when to double-down. The Gulf Coast Gamblers are experts in the aforementioned (except for the “wheeling” which is a horse-racing term). Actually, all Kenny B. & Company had to do in Week Two, was wait for the dealer to flip over their two cards to show the Blackjack of Ace/King, to win 1.5 of their bet and to cash in on a BDFL vict’ry when the Duncanville Armadillos could only manage an 18. The outcome of this one drops the Gamblers and the ‘Dillos into a three-way tie for second place in the rugged Red Neck Division with the Benton Bullets, with identical records of 1-1, all looking up to the first place Fieldstown Bellcows. Early in the season, or not, that’s an impressive start for Bellrose, even though he “opted out” of this Tide Pride tickets in 2020.

In the Kids Division…