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THE OFFICIAL INTERNET SITE OF THE BIG DADDY FOOTBALL LEAGUE |
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TheBDFL.com WIZARDZ WINNERZ 2004 |
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Past Picks |
The dynasty is dead! |
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The Wizard will have to overhaul the crystal ball in the off season to have a chance to win the POTY next season |
ELVO mathematically eliminates the Wizard NASH VEGAS - The Evil Las Vegas Oddsmakers (ELVO) have finally broken the Wizards ten year spell to win their first Prognosticator of the Year (POTY) award! An 8-0 from the Wizard this week could still make it respectable. On to the weakly picks...
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From The Crystal Ball
By Spaceman Spiff Wooden Warriors vs. Woosiers Funneling some of the Wizard’s “Funky, Cold Medina” in Week 15 and getting ready to take a ride on Jack Barnes’ “Grand Funk Railroad” in the first round of the “BDFL Cotillion” left Jaimie and the “Splendid Splinters” asking themselves “what the funk is goin’ on around here?” heading into the final week of the season. Nevertheless, the Warriors lived up to their name and slugged out a victory to carry them to their second straight appearance in the finals. Meanwhile, for much of the last half of the season, the only thing rising in Smoke Rise was the steam off the freshly dropped cow chips the Woosiers had laid. However, the Woosiers have ridden back into contention and a first ever shot at the title. Unfortunately for Tommy, the key to victory won’t be a lobotomy, some tights, and a few nifty wrestling moves. Wizard’s Winner…the Wooden Warriors.
Cheetahs vs. Gamblers Butch Neal has already loaded up the “Sin Wagon” to head north to southern Tennessee just off I-65 where he intends to winter at the Boobie Bungalow before plotting what he hopes to be his return to BDFL prominence in 2005, but before he goes his girls will have one last roll call when the Gamblers pay a visit this weekend. Meanwhile, Kenny Breal has found out that being born a ramblin’ man in the backseat of a Greyhound bus rollin’ down Highway 41 is hardly enough to guarantee anyone the birthright to play for the BDFL title every year. Something the “GE Gin Dealers” learned this year after winning two straight titles in their freshmen and sophomore years. Nevertheless, the Gamblers will be dealin’ the cards and the Cheetahs are likely to draw a “dead man’s hand” before the night is over. Wizard’s Winner…the Gamblers.
Dogs vs. Power Sleds The “Money-changin’ Cheats” from Brookside have foreclosed on most of the BDFL this year, and had a shot to play for all the marbles in “The Big Daddy Bowl” before getting pinned like a prom night carnation by the Woosiers last weekend. Similarly, the “Dolomite Mud Packers” saw their brilliant return to prominence get ambushed by the Tribe leaving this weekend for these two to decide who finishes third in the league. When the dust settles, however, the Great Wizardo says that a surprise guest appearance by Terry Taurence and the Terrible Trio performing their greatest hits in the pre-game festivities should be just enough to leave the Sleds singing the blues and the Dogs howling at the moon, both of which, come to think of it, may sound better than the night’s entertainment. Wizard’s Winner…the Dogs.
Grenades vs. Bootleggers With his legions in disarray and in full retreat, Chris Hand only has one more game before lamenting what went wrong in what seemed on paper to be a perfect scheme to give the “Ironmen” and their heavy boots of lead the path of least resistance to their first BDFL title. Despite having two teams (the Cheetahs and Mayors) that until a one-time rise to the top had never done much more than provide fodder for the rest of the league to add to another also-ran in the Sleds, the Grenades still could not find the right combination to unlock a title. What the Commish didn’t account for in his diabolical scheme was the shocking reemergence of an ancient dynasty that was thought to have long since disappeared along with Atlantis, Pompeii, the Incas, and that little Frito Bandito eraser guy. Nevertheless, the Power Sleds roared back to life and packed plenty of mud, in addition to some sand, in the Grenades and relegated Chris to watching the title chase from the outside looking in. On the other side, the “Thunder Valley Vice Lords” have spent the year looking for just the right concoction to bottle and sell to the local yokels, but have never seemed to get just the right mix of ingredients. Whether it was too much battery acid or not enough dead possums added to the brew, the Bootleggers were never able to do much more than watch their whiskey burn in the middle of Copperhead Road. Nevertheless, this weekend they will finally hit on the perfect recipe for victory. Wizard’s Winner…the Bootleggers.
Sloth Monsters vs. Mayors Mike Dismukes has suffered through a very difficult season after several years of vying for, and once winning, the BDFL title, and he hopes that his “potato-chip-munchin’-milk-guzzlin’-high-metabolism Couch Potatoes” can finish the year looking more like “Stud Spuds” than their most recent string of performances. The season finale for the “Slob Monsters” will be against the “Pseudo-Quasi-Commish” in a bowl game that should rank with the one they play on the blue artificial turf somewhere in the Great White North. These two have gone from contenders to pretenders in the span of one season with Week 17 as their last shot at a bit of redemption before bedding down for a long winter’s slumber. Ultimately, the Mayors have fared poorly on the campaign trail all year and will find the 2005 exit polls just as disappointing. Wizard’s Winner…the Sloth Monsters.
Wildcats vs. Fighting Slovaks The Great Wizardo once quoted as saying “signs, signs, everywhere is signs, blocking all the scenery, breaking my mind, do this, don’t do that, can’t you read the sign?” which was an appropriate quote for the ChildCats often difficult baptism in their inaugural season in the BDFL beginning with the “BDFL Genuine Draft”. Since misery loves company, the Wildcats should have plenty to commiserate over when they play the “Floppin’ Slovaks”, a fellow BDFL rookie. The cream always rises to the top in the BDFL and the lard normally sinks southwards. Unfortunately for the Slovaks, they will sink even faster than the Wildcats. Wizard’s Winner…the Wildcats.
Blades vs. Wizards Lyle Arrington’s strong bid for a BDFL title fell short in the highly competitive Yellow Hammer Division, but that still doesn’t put much of a damper on very a good year for the “Super Sickles”. After winning last week, the Blades will have a chance to cap a 14 win season by downing the “Dungeon Dragons” on Sunday. In a tale of two cities, the only thing Merlin has done consistently this season has been his inexplicable ability to brew up the wrong potion on a weekly basis. Something that will definitely not work against the “North Shelby Pot Planters”, who will likely play the role of “a toker, a smoker, a midnight joker” allowing them to get the last laugh on the Wizards. Wizard’s Winner…the Blades.
Juggernauts vs. Bullets The “Saturday Night Specials” showed the league last weekend why they can on occasion sling lead with the best of them in a first round rout that more closely resembled a shoot-out at the O.K. Corral than a BDFL play-off game. The Bullets will try to keep a steady hand again this Sunday as they aim to shoot down the resurgent “SlugNots” who have been punch drunk much of the season before some recent victories helped cast a brighter light on an otherwise dismal year. Nevertheless, the Juggernauts will try to end their season on a positive note at the expense of the Bullets, but will find the “Rice Burner” assembly line will likely be down again for repairs leaving Bullet with a target-rich environment. Wizard’s Winner…the Bullets. |
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The BDFL | Mayors | Grenades | Cheetahs | PowerSleds | Bullets | Gamblers | Bootleggers | Woosiers Wildcats | Juggernauts | Dogs | Blades | Wooden Warriors | Wizards | Sloth Monsters | Fighting Slovaks |
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Concept, names, logos and designs are registered trademarks and intellectual property of The BDFL© 2004 |
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