One Ranger

The Texas Armada massacres da Blitz

DRUID CITY - Texas is the Lone Star State in more ways than one. The most famous quote ever attributed to the Texas Rangers is the classic "One Riot, One Ranger." The quote is credited to legendary Texas Ranger Bill McDonald. As legend has it, sometime during the early 1900s there was huge prizefight planned in West Texas, somewhere along the Rio Grande. The frantic citizens of the town considered this a "riot" and had put out a desperate plead for a company of Rangers to come to town and shut down the fight. Imagine their shock when one solitary Ranger (McDonald) got off the train. Looking at the proverbial "Lone Ranger", the townsmen wanted to know when the rest of the Ranger company would arrive. McDonald simply replied, "One Riot, One Ranger" as he proceeded to put an end to the chaos all by himself. "One Riot, One Ranger" is also the name of the stoic statue of a Texas Ranger installed at Dallas Love Field from 1961 to 2020 and named for the famous story of Captain Bill McDonald. The 12-foot statue was donated to the city of Dallas in 1961 by the wealthy restaurateur Earle Wyatt (no hock). On June 4, 2020, the statue was removed from Love Field following the publication of the book Cult of Glory: The Bold and Brutal History of the Texas Rangers by Doug Swanson, as the city of Dallas fell to the woke miniority. It was a sad day for the State of Texas, the First Amendment, the United States of America and its legal, tax-paying citizens. The statue has been stored indefinitely by the city of Dallas. We can only hope it goes back up soon. In the BDFL, we only have one franchise based in Texas and that team is the Duncanville Armadillos (maybe they should be called the Strangers, but we'll leave that one up to the BDFL Parallel Universe coming in Throwback Week 2024). In Week 4 of the BDFL, the Texas Armada, as we like to call them in the press, moseyed on over to Alabama on Sunday to take on the Druid City Blitz. Stationed on the Black Warrior in the shadows of the Bama Belle, the Armadillos' artillery massacred da Blitz (63-31) just as they took off from the Tuscaloosa National Airport (TCL) right above Kentuck Park. Passersby and rubberneckers equated the carnage to a runaway train wreck.

God Blessed Texas by Little Texas (1993)

Final Scores

The Amendment

The Bullet Rule gets amended for 2023

TITLETOWN - Mr. Webster defines "iron hand" as a noun meaning stern, or rigorous, control such as "he ruled with an iron hand". From time to time, The Commissioner of the BDFL (Iron Hand) must live up to his name. This one may need a quick history lesson, so here we go. Back in the early days of the BDFL, it was a "points only" league, but evolved in to a win-loss record/points combo league with not many rules and a little less direction than today's BDFL. So in 1997, when the Capital City Bullets finished the regular season in the top four in total points, they qualified for the league's "old school" post-season playoffs with a 6-9 record. Nobody thought too much about it at the time since this team wasn't very formidable during the regular season and didn't seem to be a threat to win one post-season game, much less the league's championship title. However, when the Bullets put together a miraculous two-game winning streak in the playoffs and won their first BDFL title with an 8-9 losing record, there was an outcry throughout the entire football world that had to be addressed. The Bullets 1998 title became commonly known as the league's "tainted title" and is still footnoted as such in all league records. We don't try to change history in the BDFL, but we do learn from it in the BDFL. Therefore, Iron Hand, The Commissioner of the BDFL instituted the patented "Bullet Rule" to keep such a travesty from ever happening again. In 1998 when it went into effect, the BDFL's "Bullet Rule" clearly stated that no team could qualify for the league's championship series with a losing record. The "Bullet Rule" has served the league well for 25 years, but the rigid rule has created a couple of post-season hardships over the years since the BDFL went to an eight-team post-season with the Big Daddy Championship Series (BDCS) in 2006 and the NFL went to an 17-game regular season in 2021. Last BDFL season (2022) for instance, the league only produced six eligible teams for the BDFL. Iron Hand has to think fast and added two teams to the BDCS mix, one with a new "Amnesty 2022" provision to override the long-standing "Bullet Rule" and added a replacement team (North River Neanderthals) just to give the league's elite BDCS post-season bracket some credibility. Enough is enough. So after off-season meetings with the league's Board of Regents in Destin, Florida, the BDFL has amended the league's long-standing "Bullet Rule" with a slight amendment. To keep the league's integrity intact and to help insure eight teams make the BDCS and to assure there will never be another "tainted title", beginning with the 2023 BDFL season the league's amended "Bullet Rule" will allow teams with 7-8 regular season record to be eligible for the league's championship. This amendment decision was made for the betterment of the league overall and it will still assure that no team will ever win another "tainted" BDFL Championship Title with a losing record.